Bronwyn Green

The Corner of Quirky & Kinky

I was talking to a very dear friend yesterday. I met her at a Tori Amos concert seventeen (HOLY CRAP) years ago through a mutual friend. I love this woman – she’s amazing. And hilarious.

Now, it’s a wonder that she even wanted to be friends with me after meeting me because I was nine months pregnant with Killian, it was the middle of a miserable, humid August and let’s face it, I was the bitchiest bitch who’d ever bitched. I hated being pregnant. And I especially hated being pregnant in the middle of August. I was evil incarnate. And yet, this lovely woman liked me anyway. And I’m grateful, because I adore the hell out of her.

So, anyway, I was talking with her today about my hellish deadlines coming up and menages quickly became the topic of discussion. I have several due before the end of the year and we had the following conversation.

Friend: What I want to know, is are they written the way they happen in real life?

Me: I’m thinking no.

Friend: That’s probably for the best. Whenever I was part of one, I felt like that hostess at a dinner party that wasn’t going particularly well. Is everyone having a good time? Can I get you anything? Do you need more potatoes? It was exhausting.

Me: It’s better in fiction. I have to blog this.

Friend: Do it.

And now, whenever I’m in the midst of writing menage scenes, I’m forever going to think about the beleaguered dinner party hostess. And it becomes very clear to me that I would never find myself in a menage for the same reasons I don’t host parties.

Worry, social anxiety and a possible lack of potatoes.

Today on the way to school, we were discussing Halloween and costumes.

Corwin: I need a Russian accent for my costume.

Me: Beg your pardon?

Corwin: My costume needs a Russian accent. The guy is Russian.

Me: You realize they don’t come prepackaged, right?

Corwin: Duh, mother. I have to develop one. Why don’t we have an accent?

Me: We do. It’s called a midwestern accent.

Corwin: Well, I’d rather have an Irish accent or a Scottish one.

Me: You and me both.

Corwin: I wonder what the girls at school would think if I had an accent.

Me: They’d probably love it. Trust me – girls dig accents.

Corwin: Memo to me: must get accent, soon.

Yep…that’s the one I have.

If you haven’t met Sommer Marsden already, here’s your chance! I have to tell you, this woman amazes me. She’s super sweet, funny as hell and quirky-quirky-quirky. I know what you’re thinking – she’s my kind of person. She’s also a wonderful, not to mention crazy-prolific, writer. And she’s also giving away an ebook (winner’s choice) to one lucky commenter, so just sit back get to know Sommer and leave a comment with your email address. The winner will be chosen by random Thursday, September 29th after 7 pm EST.

And now, the interview!

How did your writing path evolve?

I’m not even sure I have a path. More like a series of dark alleyways. But I’ve always wanted to write. And I did in grade school in a GT program and then I didn’t. And then I did in college and then I stopped. And then I did it ‘for real’ after girl child was born. And then I stopped! (do you see a pattern?). I was homeschooling the kiddos at the time. And then in 2005 I said screw it, I’m doing it for real and I’ve been writing every day ever since. See, more like a drunken maze than a path.
What type of research do you do for your books?

As little as possible. I loathe it (barring some really fun stuff like zombies). The reason being, I am usually more interested in telling the story of the characters than schooling the reader in another topic. I try to put in enough for it all to be plausible but not focus on the stuff that isn’t character driven.
From what or where do you derive the most inspiration for your stories?

If I ever find out I’ll tell you! Some things that have sparked entire books are: songs, song titles, random phrases, eavesdropping, people watching, the man…the man…the man (he’s a good muse), and the every wonderful ‘what-if?’

Tell us about your upcoming releases?

Ooooh. Big Bad is out October 14th. It’s the story of a Werewolf/Human/Vamp love triangle that involves reincarnation, bad guys, falling in love at first sight for the second time with the same person and a Scottish secondary character who is begging for his own book. After that is Long Lost the sequel to Big Bad and on my 40th birthday, December 1st!, my collection The Best of Sommer Marsden is out in the UK (US to follow). There’s more, but we’ll stick with all that shiny goodness! 🙂
What are you working on at the moment?

A book by a me who is not Sommer, a bunch of short stories for various editors and the first tickling of my next book as Sommer. Which is untitled but starting to whisper in my ear.
What do you like best about being a writer? What do you like least?

I like everything about being a writer for the most part. My least favorite of the lot is usually rewrites (which I don’t have to do often, thank goodness) and sometimes promoting myself. I’m not really a me-me-me! person and the need to put yourself out there is very real. So I do it. My goal, most days, is to do it in a way that I’m more chatting/interacting with folks than just banging my LOOK AT ME! drum.
What would you do if you weren’t a writer?

I have no clue. It’s been so long. However, I was very good at my old job. I was the Admin Assistant for 13 counselors at a medical rehab company. I was a paperwork Nazi. If you did it wrong, no soup for you! I also, on the days I get discouraged and/or irrationally irritated and threaten to quit writing, entertain fantasies of being a dog groomer at the local dog salon. Don’t ask me why. I’m not the world’s most patient person so I’d probably get mauled on day one.
What do you enjoy doing when you’re not writing?

I like se—oh, that’s not what you mean. I like to cook and bake and hang out on the sofa with the man (I’m a wild child, I tell ya). Of course, I love to read, and I do sew and craft (not as much as I used to). I run [insert hysterical laughter here. I shuffle with intent], walk, ride my bike to nowhere (exercise bike) and I sit around the fire pit with my family and force them to talk to me. I’m also addicted to reality TV.
Of all of the characters you’ve created, who is your favorite and why?

I have to say, as it stands right now, Ellis and Ruby from Big Bad. Why? Their dynamic together. I literally missed those characters when I was done writing them.

Do you find it difficult to keep love/sex scenes fresh and interesting?

Nope. I think it’s always interesting if you stay in your characters. Every person is different, so every character is different, so all sex should be different. Ya know?
What genre of books least appeals to you and why?

Westerns! (I don’t know why. I’ve just never been a fan of books or movies). Used to be Urban Fantasy/SciFi but writers like Stacia Kane Stacey Jay have made me more open to that genre.

Do you listen to music when you write or do you need quiet? If you listen to music – what kind?

Neither. I can’t do music because I get distracted by singing along (I’m one of those people who remembers 99% of the lyrics she’s ever heard) and quiet makes my mind wander. I write to the TV in the background. I might not focus on it or even know what’s on for hours, but it’s background chatter for yours truly to concentrate against, which makes me focus on my book/story.

What makes a man sexy?

His sense of humor. And his forearms.

Do you family and friends know you write erotic romance – if so, how have they reacted?

Yes and yes. Most have been great. A few have been shocked. But for the most part they just get irritated that I won’t let them read my work. Most of them know what I do but not who I am. Heh. Evil me.

What’s your favorite food?

French fries! Next question!

Do you have any bad habits?

The real question should be do I have any good habits. I do tend to hit Etsy.com late at night with a glass of wine and go through a streak of “ooooh, let’s put that in the cart.” And said wine. Beyond that, I’m fairly good. (Would you like to buy a bridge?)

If you were stranded on a desert isle, what five things would you want to have with you?

A cell phone, a lap top, a portable hot spot, a freight box full of wine and well, a boat, to get off the damn isle. 😀

Do you have any pet peeves?

People who mumble, writers who rip apart other writer’s work (in my humble opinion you’d better have pristine and infallible writing to do this), people who shove their ideas down my throat, the believe that love at first sight is somehow laughable and the word ‘belch’.

What do you like about where you live?

We are a town known for characters. They’re good fodder for a writer.

If you could travel back in time, would you? If so, what time period would you visit and why?

God no. I have enough trouble not effing up the present. I have no urge to go mess stuff up that’s already happened.

You can also find Sommer on her Blog, Twitter and Facebook. Go do it! She’s awesome!

If you haven’t met Sommer Marsden already, here’s your chance! I have to tell you, this woman amazes me. She’s super sweet, funny as hell and quirky-quirky-quirky. I know what you’re thinking – she’s my kind of person. She’s also a wonderful, not to mention crazy-prolific, writer. And she’s also giving away an ebook (winner’s choice) to one lucky commenter, so just sit back get to know Sommer and leave a comment with your email address. The winner will be chosen by random Thursday, September 29th after 7 pm EST.

And now, the interview!

How did your writing path evolve?

I’m not even sure I have a path. More like a series of dark alleyways. But I’ve always wanted to write. And I did in grade school in a GT program and then I didn’t. And then I did in college and then I stopped. And then I did it ‘for real’ after girl child was born. And then I stopped! (do you see a pattern?). I was homeschooling the kiddos at the time. And then in 2005 I said screw it, I’m doing it for real and I’ve been writing every day ever since. See, more like a drunken maze than a path.
What type of research do you do for your books?

As little as possible. I loathe it (barring some really fun stuff like zombies). The reason being, I am usually more interested in telling the story of the characters than schooling the reader in another topic. I try to put in enough for it all to be plausible but not focus on the stuff that isn’t character driven.
From what or where do you derive the most inspiration for your stories?

If I ever find out I’ll tell you! Some things that have sparked entire books are: songs, song titles, random phrases, eavesdropping, people watching, the man…the man…the man (he’s a good muse), and the every wonderful ‘what-if?’

Tell us about your upcoming releases?

Ooooh. Big Bad is out October 14th. It’s the story of a Werewolf/Human/Vamp love triangle that involves reincarnation, bad guys, falling in love at first sight for the second time with the same person and a Scottish secondary character who is begging for his own book. After that is Long Lost the sequel to Big Bad and on my 40th birthday, December 1st!, my collection The Best of Sommer Marsden is out in the UK (US to follow). There’s more, but we’ll stick with all that shiny goodness! 🙂
What are you working on at the moment?

A book by a me who is not Sommer, a bunch of short stories for various editors and the first tickling of my next book as Sommer. Which is untitled but starting to whisper in my ear.
What do you like best about being a writer? What do you like least?

I like everything about being a writer for the most part. My least favorite of the lot is usually rewrites (which I don’t have to do often, thank goodness) and sometimes promoting myself. I’m not really a me-me-me! person and the need to put yourself out there is very real. So I do it. My goal, most days, is to do it in a way that I’m more chatting/interacting with folks than just banging my LOOK AT ME! drum.
What would you do if you weren’t a writer?

I have no clue. It’s been so long. However, I was very good at my old job. I was the Admin Assistant for 13 counselors at a medical rehab company. I was a paperwork Nazi. If you did it wrong, no soup for you! I also, on the days I get discouraged and/or irrationally irritated and threaten to quit writing, entertain fantasies of being a dog groomer at the local dog salon. Don’t ask me why. I’m not the world’s most patient person so I’d probably get mauled on day one.
What do you enjoy doing when you’re not writing?

I like se—oh, that’s not what you mean. I like to cook and bake and hang out on the sofa with the man (I’m a wild child, I tell ya). Of course, I love to read, and I do sew and craft (not as much as I used to). I run [insert hysterical laughter here. I shuffle with intent], walk, ride my bike to nowhere (exercise bike) and I sit around the fire pit with my family and force them to talk to me. I’m also addicted to reality TV.
Of all of the characters you’ve created, who is your favorite and why?

I have to say, as it stands right now, Ellis and Ruby from Big Bad. Why? Their dynamic together. I literally missed those characters when I was done writing them.

Do you find it difficult to keep love/sex scenes fresh and interesting?

Nope. I think it’s always interesting if you stay in your characters. Every person is different, so every character is different, so all sex should be different. Ya know?
What genre of books least appeals to you and why?

Westerns! (I don’t know why. I’ve just never been a fan of books or movies). Used to be Urban Fantasy/SciFi but writers like Stacia Kane Stacey Jay have made me more open to that genre.

Do you listen to music when you write or do you need quiet? If you listen to music – what kind?

Neither. I can’t do music because I get distracted by singing along (I’m one of those people who remembers 99% of the lyrics she’s ever heard) and quiet makes my mind wander. I write to the TV in the background. I might not focus on it or even know what’s on for hours, but it’s background chatter for yours truly to concentrate against, which makes me focus on my book/story.

What makes a man sexy?

His sense of humor. And his forearms.

Do you family and friends know you write erotic romance – if so, how have they reacted?

Yes and yes. Most have been great. A few have been shocked. But for the most part they just get irritated that I won’t let them read my work. Most of them know what I do but not who I am. Heh. Evil me.

What’s your favorite food?

French fries! Next question!

Do you have any bad habits?

The real question should be do I have any good habits. I do tend to hit Etsy.com late at night with a glass of wine and go through a streak of “ooooh, let’s put that in the cart.” And said wine. Beyond that, I’m fairly good. (Would you like to buy a bridge?)

If you were stranded on a desert isle, what five things would you want to have with you?

A cell phone, a lap top, a portable hot spot, a freight box full of wine and well, a boat, to get off the damn isle. 😀

Do you have any pet peeves?

People who mumble, writers who rip apart other writer’s work (in my humble opinion you’d better have pristine and infallible writing to do this), people who shove their ideas down my throat, the believe that love at first sight is somehow laughable and the word ‘belch’.

What do you like about where you live?

We are a town known for characters. They’re good fodder for a writer.

If you could travel back in time, would you? If so, what time period would you visit and why?

God no. I have enough trouble not effing up the present. I have no urge to go mess stuff up that’s already happened.

You can also find Sommer on her Blog, Twitter and Facebook. Go do it! She’s awesome!

Today is Cait’s birthday. She’s twenty-six, this year. For those of you keeping track at home, that’s eighteen years between us. Our mom calls us her bookends. I’m the oldest, Cait’s the youngest and there’s nothing but boys between us.

I was so freaking excited when she was born. After three brothers and two step-brothers, I was dying for a sister. Not that I don’t adore all of my brothers – I do. I really have some awesome ones. But, I still always wanted a sister.

It’s probably a good thing there are eighteen years between us. This way we end up being not only sisters but the best of friends. If we were any closer in age, we probably would have killed each other.

She’s one of the most amazing people I know, and I’m surrounded by them on all sides. Brilliant, a stickler for historical and grammatical accuracy, hysterically funny, kind (though she’d probably argue that) a natural with kids and a fantastic writer with a voice like a booze-soaked angel. This girl can sing. She’s got a big, gorgeous voice that carries for miles. Also, she spontaneously breaks into song. I love that.

These words don’t even begin to do her justice. I wish I could somehow share a little Cait with everyone. I think the world would be a better place. I know mine is far better because of her.

I love you, Didder! Happy Birthday to my girlie! You are the best!


Soooooo, I was supposed to pick a winner for Anna Mayle’s contest yesterday at 7pm…but I kinda got distracted by Italian food, cake and ice cream, a Rockband sing-a-long, and my family. We had Killian’s birthday party last night, and I totally flaked.

I’m so sorry.

However, without any further ado

or excuses…

I give you the winner.

Bookwyrm369…you just won your very own copy of Lullaby for a Stolen Child!!! Congrats!!!

I’ll pass your info on to Anna, and you should hear from her soon!

Tuesday was the first day of school. Not only was it the first day of school, it was also the day that the first big project of the year was handed out.

The Bug Project of Doom (Okay, I added the “of doom” part, but the bugs, that’s all the science teacher, who’s clearly a fucking sadist. But more on that in a bit.)

So for two hours today, I helped Corwin catch bugs (read: squealed and pointed) and so did Killian and Brynn’s oldest son. They were awesome. Well, except for the part where they scared the hell out of me with this HUGE ASS SPIDER. And they discovered for themselves what kind of freak I am. I’m pretty sure the neighbors thought I was being murdered. The boys felt bad and hugged me. Apparently, they’ve never heard me make that noise before.

This is the evil spider… It’s in a sandwich container and it’s spider-y butt is about the size of a nickel. Too damn big in my opinion. Two words. Satan’s Snowflake.

But I digress. So the boys collected other bugs and sealed them in their tupperware containers. Luckily, they found seven of the ten required. The spider was a bonus. An evil bonus.

Before I tell you this next part, you need to understand something about Corwin. He’s really softhearted. When he was little, he wouldn’t step on ants like his classmates, he’d protect them and try to build elaborate houses for them out of leaves and sticks. He’s got the biggest heart of anyone I know. He loves animals and can’t stand to see anything or anyone mistreated. Today, I learned that that love extends to bugs, too.

Part of this damn assignment is to kill the bugs so they can be mounted on a board and displayed for a grade. The methods are freezing and a cotton ball soaked with nail polish remover. Well, I don’t wear nail polish, so there’s no remover in this house. So freezing it would have to be.

I knew there would be a problem when he said to me from the backseat, “This grasshopper looks like he’s thinking ‘I get to go home after this, right?'” The commentary about the grasshopper continued off and on on the way home and by the time he had to put the bugs in the freezer, he was really upset about having to “murder them.”

I was torn between telling him we’d just deal with the bad grade and he didn’t have to do it and worrying that that would could turn into a habit of avoiding difficult tasks because he doesn’t want to do them. By the time we made it home, most of the bugs were dead because of lack of oxygen. But not that grasshopper. No…of course not. He had to put it in the freezer.

We both realize that the coming autumn would have killed these bugs anyway. But that’s different than being the one to do it. I get that 95% of 8th graders could care less about freezing a grasshopper to death. But then there are the 5% who want nothing to do with taking a life. Should they be made to? Did I fail him as a parent for not speaking up in time and saying, “Fuck the project.”

I think I might have.

All I know is that I have a sad kid who’s racked with guilt and keeps looking balefully at the freezer.