Bronwyn Green

The Corner of Quirky & Kinky

Today is the first day of school for the 2011 – 2012 school year. I know most parents are overjoyed about their kids going back to school. I’m not one of them. All for purely selfish reasons.

Some are obvious. I like sleep. I don’t like getting up two and a half hours earlier than normal so I can get them to school on time. I really don’t like spending three and a half to four hours a day in the car driving them and their friends back and forth because damn, it cuts way too much time out of my work day.

Yeah, I know I made that decision when I decided to send them out of district so they could get an actual education as opposed to experience the crowd control method of teaching our local schools offer. And I don’t regret it, but it is exhausting. Also, I genuinely like spending time with them. They’re hilarious and genuinely sweet kids.

Other reasons I’m not crazy about the start of this school year is because it feels like the beginning of the end. Killian is starting his senior year and will be seventeen in three days. Corwin is starting eighth grade – his last year before high school begins for him. They’re not babies anymore. Of course, they’ll always be my babies, but I don’t imagine I’ll be rocking them to sleep anytime soon, or having them sit on my lap while I read them stories or just for a cuddle. I love the young men they’re growing into, but I miss those days more than I can tell you.

And here’s the thing. I’m lucky. I’m so damn lucky. I have my boys. So many people have lost their children to illness, accident or catastrophe. I get to see what comes next. I don’t have to wonder what might have been.

Job-wise, this fall is going to be a little crazy-pants, but I’m going to try to be as present and in the moment as I can, because really, this – this life with these kids – is the most important thing I’ll ever do.

So, I hope you’ll forgive me. I’ve got a little something something in my eye.

First and foremost, I suck because I keep forgetting to mention important things like release dates. Mostly, because life is crazy and I’m just trying to keep my head above water. But this is what I’ve been up to lately.

But anyhow, I’ve have a couple of new releases lately. The first is a short story called Maiden’s Grail. It’s part of the awesome anthology, called Seducing the Myth, edited by the amazing Lucy Felthouse. Seriously – I adore this woman. And bonus! The book is filled with scads of other fabulous stories!

Here’s a bit about the antho:

Seducing the Myth: Myths and Legends with an Erotic Twist is a collection of 24 tantalising tales that lead you on a decadent journey through mythologies the world over. As well as stories from the popular Greek and Roman periods, this anthology will also delight you with Arabian, Arthurian, Hindu, Jewish, Norse, Slavic, Sumerian and Welsh myths and legends. Add in a delicious sprinkling of fairies, mermaids and ancient fertility rituals and you have a recipe for a wickedly erotic read!

And today, I have another short story out. It’s a retelling of the Persephone/Hades myth – one of my faves! It’s called Does Your Mother Know? and it’s available at Resplendence Publishing.

Here’s the blurb:

Lured from the overprotective, controlling grasp of her mother, Persephone journeys to the Underworld to meet Hades—the sinister man who’s invaded her dreams. Dark and dangerous, he brings to life desires she didn’t know existed. But in satisfying the cravings of her flesh will she lose her soul?

Do you ever feel like you should come with a warning label?

I do. A lot.

This is one of those times.

When I’m doing research, I’d rather talk to people in the field as opposed to reading about it. I always end up with some oddball question that can’t be answered by a book or website. I also like hands on research. This is how I ended up taking a ten week citizens’ police academy course. Yes. It was just as hilariously awkward as you’d think it would be. But, it was totally worth it in terms of research material as well as meeting people I genuinely like and respect.

My other favorite research method is cold calling. This is when I try to repress the fact that I’m actually very shy, suck it up and start making phone calls to people in the field that I’m writing about. I usually end up having to explain myself to at least one or two of the office staff before being allowed to leave a vaguely awkward sounding voicemail message where I hope against hope that my subject calls me back.

I’d like to tell you about Bill. He called me back. He’s probably regretting it with every fiber of his being at the moment, but more on that later.

Many of you know that I set my werebear shifter story in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. Why, you might wonder? Well, I wanted someplace that black bears would be relatively common. I wanted an area I knew well-ish. And hey, honestly? I just really like that area.

So anyway, I called the Baraga DNR (Department of Natural Resources) office since that was the town in which I’d decided to set my story. The very nice secretary passed me along to Bill’s voicemail and a while later he called me back. I explained that I was an author and that I’d like some information about bears. He kindly obliged, told me some awesome stories about bears, Michigan’s bat population and how DNR officers jump out of helicopters to tag moose.

He asked a little more about me and my books, and I explained the erotic romance genre and the popularity of ménage as well as shape shifter stories. He was clearly baffled, but a good sport about it. I asked him if I could cite him on the acknowledgment page, and he kindly agreed. Now, when I cite a source, I always do a full citation. So if it’s one of my cop buddies, I spell out their name, rank and department. I did the same thing with Bill.

Just Right released with the rest of the books in the Not Quite Wicked series and went on to do quite well. I wrote the next book in the series and went off that summer to vacation in the Upper Peninsula. While I was there, I got to meet Bill. He’s just as awesome in person as he is on the phone. He’s funny, knowledgeable and tells great stories. He took me, the hubby, our kids, one of my brothers and 2 of my nephews into an iron mine. We did the tour and then he got permission to take us off the tour track farther back into the mine where it was dark, wet, muddy, rife with debris and giant holes in the ground. More importantly, there were bats.

It’s no secret to anyone who reads this blog on a regular basis that I love bats. Well, so does Bill. In fact, the locals call him Batman.

He is, understandably, not amused by this.

But he is a bat specialist. He showed us where a few young males were hanging out the inside of the rock walls and fluttering around. He gave us all kinds of great info. I loved it and so did the rest of the fam. We went out to lunch, then Bill took us to the Millie Mine Bat Viewing station. Of course, it was daytime and the bats were snoozing, but I was still pleased to see they had a safe place to sleep. All in all it was a great day, and I was so glad to get a chance to thank Bill in person for helping me with my research.

Fast forward to the end of this school year. Per Bill’s request, I sent him a signed copy of the Not Quite Wicked anthology. Apparently, said copy of the book got passed around the office, Bill was mocked mercilessly because he’d been involved with a “sex book”. And that’s when it got a little ugly. He was ridiculed endlessly because I’d been too thorough when listing out the location in the acknowledgments.

I was terrified that this absolutely wonderful guy was going to lose his job because I was doing my job and documenting. He’d gone out of his way to help me out with info, not to mention, spending his day off with my family, and I had jeopardized his position. In short, I felt like utter shit.

I offered to call/write and apologize to everyone in the office if need be. He didn’t think it would be necessary, but he told me he’d let me know if it came to that. Well, the school year ended, and I didn’t hear anything. Summer wore on…nothing. Finally, it was vacation time. I thought about calling to see how things were going, but time got away from me. Also I totally chickened out. While vacationing in the UP, I even drove past the Baraga DNR office on my way to Copper Harbor, and I thought about stopping. I even talked to Brynn about it from the road. I think she dared me to stop in and say hi, but that seemed like a terri-bad idea, so I kept driving.

Well, I got a phone call today. It was Bill.

My stomach immediately sank when I saw the area code. I was terrified that he was going to tell me he’d lost his job and it was all my fault.

I’m pleased to report that this wasn’t the case. Although, there’s other…stuff.

Apparently, last night was the DNR Wildlife Division Annual In-service where they hand out awards. I’m imagining it to be like the Academy Awards with more fur and claws and far fewer sequins and borrowed jewelry. I could be wrong though. Maybe the DNR peeps like bling as much as Hollywood.

Anyway, in addition to the other awards, the fine folk at the DNR give out the Bone (formerly Boner) Award every year. From my understanding, it’s given to someone who’s done something especially boneheaded—an epically stupid blunder. And I think we all know who this year’s recipient was.

Oh, yes.

And who’s responsible for him getting this award?

Why, yes. That would be me. This is where the warning label comes in.

Bill ended up receiving the award (a bone mounted to a piece of wood) with a big ole poster of the cover of Just Right, with his face photoshopped in there somewhere, while someone read passages of the story. Aloud. Evidently, there was a bit of trouble finding non-dirty bits to read. Oops.

Oh yeah…and? They retired the award last night. Apparently, they don’t think it can get any worse than this. I feel certain I could disabuse them of that notion quickly enough. After all, I’m not considered a cautionary tale for nothing.

According to Bill, had he known he was going to receive this honor, he would have called me up and made me go to the ceremony with him. (Not cool, Bill.) Luckily, for me, he didn’t.

However, he thinks that sales may spike this week because many of the attendees were googling me on their smart phones. (Yay…I think…) He also said that if he’d had a stack of the books, he could have sold them all last night.

And apparently, as punishment, when I’m on vacation next summer, I have to stop at the DNR office and get my picture taken with Bill and the Boner Award. I can only imagine how truly, truly horrible and awkward this will be. But after what poor Bill has gone through, it’s the least I can do. I also plan to take him out to lunch. There will likely be a blog about it. Unless I die of embarrassment before I can post.

Hope springs eternal.

Okay, so after 23 years our fridge decided to slowly commit suicide. We came home from vacation a few weeks ago to find it leaking on the floor. It only got good and cold in certain areas and the light flickered menacingly whenever the door was opened as if to say, “Do you dare to put your hand inside? Do you? Are you sure?” I don’t think that was just the leftovers talking. I think the fridge wanted to be left alone to die in peace.

Reluctantly, we decided that it was probably time for a new one. Now, you have to understand that unless we’re talking books, fabrics or ren faires, I LOATHE shopping. I hate it with the fiery passion of a thousand burning suns. Seriously, I hate the hell out of it. I especially hate shopping with my husband.

Now you all know, I love this guy to bits, but nine times out of ten, I’d rather chew broken glass wrapped in tin foil than go shopping with him. When I shop, I look, I point, I buy, I leave. When Matt shops, he must go to every store in the area that carries whatever it is that we’re interested in. Then there must be elaborate notes taken on models, delivery cost, etc at each store. Then the lists must be cross referenced. And all I can think is, I’d be done already, home and working on the next scene in my book.

So we made the rounds – fewer this time because thankyoubabyjesusinamanger – he shopped online first and made lists before leaving the house. So we went, we shopped, we bought. We even got a pretty good deal.

Fast forward two weeks and I’ve got delivery guys calling me.

Delivery Guys: Are you home? We’ve been pounding on your door for ten minutes.

Me: No, you’ve been pounding on the door of a house up the block.

Delivery Guys: Oh. Well that explains why no one is answering it.

Me: That would indeed be why.

So the guys (who are very cute) show up and take out our dying fridge out and bring the new one in. Only…guess what? It doesn’t fit. The space that Matt measured will not hold our lovely new water dispensing, ice making, side-by-side fridge.

Of course, my natural response was to tweet about it.

Delivery Guy: Are you…tweeting?

Me: Yup.

Delivery Guy: About this?

Me: There’s a fridge in the middle of my hobbit-sized kitchen. This is absolutely tweet worthy.

Delivery Guy: Did you tell people we’re good looking?

Me: Nope – I said you were hot!

Corwin: Mother!

Delivery Guy: Right on!

I called Matt to figure out what we wanted to do – keep the fridge and figure out a way to make it fit or have them haul the dying one back in and GO SHOPPING AGAIN. Wanna guess which one we went with?

Yeah, there’s a fridge in the middle of my kitchen making it nearly impossible to cook, clean or otherwise function. It’s been there since Wednesday and it’ll be there until Saturday when hopefully Matt can get the appropriate tools back from whomever borrowed them to whittle away even more of my pathetic amount of counter space.

I keep telling myself that it’ll be worth it in the end. In the meanwhile, I’m trying not to scream obscenities.

The Authors After Dark conference in Philly was absolutely amazing! I had so much fun with the usual crew – Brynn Paulin, Jen Armintrout, Mia Watts, Simone Anderson, Carol Lynne and the lovely Jill Welch. We all caravaned to Philadelphia from Michigan. It was a looonnnnnngggg drive – 13 hours one way, but we had fun listening to books on tape. But more on that, later.

I finally got to meet my friends Jess Jarman and Gwendolyn Cease! We’ve been internet and phone buds for years, but this was the first time I got to meet them in person and it was fantastic – as was Gwen’s delightful sister, Jude.

Stella Price was jaw-droppingly amazing as always. I have no idea how this woman does what she does as stays sane. I adore her. I can’t imagine not attending this conference. It’s, by far, my fave!

So Brynn, Jen, Mia, Jess, Gwen and I decided to host a party and give away an iPad 2 along with 12 e-books to one lucky reader. It turned out to be a hilarious karaoke party. It was total madness that turned into a sing-a-long with a guest dancer/party crasher from an MBA conference – we were clearly having more fun at our con than he was at his.

We sang. Our guests sang. Carol Lynne requested that the hostesses sing Kung-Fu Fighting. (Because she’s pure evil.) It isn’t everyday you can make an ass out of yourself in front of a room full of readers, fellow authors and your bosses. But yeah. We did it. I didn’t think I’d say this, but I’d totally do it again. As long as Jen MCs – she was nothing short of brilliant.

The panels were fun. I was a little nervous about answering questions, but I think I did okay. I hope so, anyway.

One of my favorite parts was meeting authors I’ve been chatting with like Eliza Gayle and Elise Hepner. And also new to me authors like Ethan Day, Kris Cook, Crymsyn Hart and Melissa Schroeder.

I also got to see lots of awesome blogger and readers which is always a blast. There’s something magical about being around other people who love books as much as you do.

I didn’t get to see as much of the city as I would have liked, but I loved what I saw.

One of the best things happened on the way home. Brynn bought some audio books to listen to. I won’t name names, but one of them couldn’t decide if it wanted to be a sweet romance, an erotic romance or a nursing home book. The writing was horrid, not to mention cliche. But we had a riot laughing at the story and acting out passages. It was several hours well spent!

All in all, it was a fabulous conference and I can’t wait until next year!

So I ran into Hobby Lobby today, to get some last minute supplies for AAD and there was this display of calendars by the front door and I had an awesome misread that made me laugh out loud. Of course, I was all by myself, so this just made me look slightly crazier than I already did muttering about willow leaves and panne velvet fabric.

Here’s what the calendar actually said: He Restores My Soul

Here’s what I read: Restrooms of My Soul

Now that’s a calendar I would have bought.

Well, I’m back from vacation. I’m glad to be home, but I’m going to miss falling asleep to the sounds of waves on the shore, wind in the trees and coyote howls. I’m also going to miss campfires and seeing bazillions of stars at night.

I will not, however, miss the too small bed or the bathroom that’s even tinier than our current bathroom. (Hint: I can stand in the middle of the room and touch all four walls without moving other than to spin…and I have T-Rex arms.)

But, on to the pictures. These are just some really pretty flowers growing down by Indian Lake where we stayed. After I took this picture, my niece picked them and braided them into my hair.

This is a log that washed out of the lake a few years ago. It’s particularly cool, because it was clearly meant to be part of someone’s cabin. Around the turn of the century, people would transport the logs across the lake by pulling them over the ice. The owners of the cabins we stayed in figured that this one broke through the ice and decades later, finally made it to shore. It makes a lovely bench.

A storm blowing in off Lake Michigan while we were swimming.

Indian Lake after the storm. There was a rainbow, too, but it didn’t photograph well.

Lake Superior at Grand Marais. It was the first time I’d ever been here. I love it and I’ll definitely be going back next year.
Lots of beautiful stones here. Killian, Corwin, Killian’s girlfriend and my niece all helped me find pretty stones to bring home. ‘Cause, clearly, I need more rocks. O.o
I bet after all this water, it looks pretty weird to see a building, but this one is special. I drove all the way up to Copper Harbor on Thursday and on the way I drove through Houghton where Matt went to school and then into Hancock where we lived for a year. This is our first apartment! The downstairs used to be a chiropractor’s office and a video store and there were two apartments upstairs. Ours was the one on the right. The huge window above the kitchen sink stared at nothing but the cinder block wall of the building next door. I always wanted to paint a mural on the wall, but I never got around to it. I loved this place.


Oh look…it’s more water. What a shocker that must be for you all. This is the western-most edge of Michigan and yet another one of Lake Superior’s beaches.
This is Jacob’s Falls located on Highway 26 right before you head into Eagle Harbor. There are waterfalls all over the U.P.

This is a place I’ve been trying to remember for years. When Matt was in college, we took several day trips with friends and these stairs lead up to a terrifyingly gorgeous spot along Lake Superior.
The locals called it Devil’s Wash Basin. It’s a rock formation that juts out into the water and there’s a circular opening between the rocks. Basically, if you were unlucky enough to fall in the water you’d most likely end up with a broken neck or a head injury since there’s really no getting out.
And yes…we were stupid enough to climb on them. I have no idea what we were thinking aside from being young incredibly stupid.
You might be wondering about this Road Ends sign. This is as far as you can drive in Michigan. This is it. From here on out, you’re on foot ’til you hit the water.

This is just a really pretty stream along Highway 41.

Sunset over the southern shore of Lake Superior shortly before the storm from hell came and stranded me along Highway 94. The rain was cold, the road was warm so it was nothing but mist, darkness and rain so heavy I literally couldn’t see to drive. At all. And I had to pee.
More of that same sunset.
Sunset on the last night on Indian Lake.

I love this place – so, so much.


I’m already planning for next year!

As soon as I finish the laundry, the packing, the day job and hopefully two more chapters of my WIP, this chick is out of here!

I’m taking off with the fam for a much needed vacation to Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. I can’t wait to get out of this sauna of a city! Hopefully, it’s much cooler up there.

Today, I’m over at Writer’s Evolution, blogging about stuff I’ve learned. C’mon over and check it out. You may find some useful tips over there.

See this chair? This is where I’ll be on Saturday night…reading on my iPad and watching the sun set. 🙂

A long time ago, in a far away land known as High School, I met the amazingly wonderful Margaret Yang. We’ve been friends ever since. In a weird twist of fate, I remember Harry from junior high band, but I’m fairly certain he doesn’t remember me. It’s weird, because I lived all the way across the state at the time – hundreds of miles away from where I met Margaret.

But anyway, I digress. I want to introduce you all to Margaret and Harry. They’re the phenomenal writing team that make up M.H. Mead. How phenomenal are they? Let me put it this way – hubby and I rarely read the same book – much less love the same book. But we both loved Fate’s Mirror. We’re talking mass spectrum appeal, here!

Margaret and Harry have graciously offered to have a blog contest. All you need to do is comment and a random winner will be chosen at 7pm, Friday the 22nd. The winner will receive his or her choice of an e-book or a print book.

So read the interview, check out the blurb and cover art and leave a comment. You don’t want to miss this book!

Now, on to the interview…

How did your writing path evolve?

Margaret: It started with an idea. I had a mind-blowing idea for a science fiction novel, but I’d never written any spec fic before. I told the idea to my pal Harry, the spec fic writer….

Harry: I immediately saw how the idea could be turned into a novel. I told Margaret how I would do it if it were my book….

Margaret: and I said, “Are we really going to do this? Are we going to write a novel together?” The idea was at once exhilarating and terrifying.

Harry: I said, “Why not?” which is how I usually approach these things.

Margaret: We’ve been partners ever since. I don’t know why our partnership works so well. It just does.

Harry: Of course you know why it works. It’s because we share a brain.

Besides sharing a brain, you also share a pen name. Why?

We thought about it for years. When we were trying to sell our first novel, we met agents who wouldn’t even look at our stuff unless we submitted it under a single pseudonym. Some readers won’t read novels written by two people, either. It just seemed the easiest and most natural thing to put a single name on the book cover. However, inside the book, our author bio starts out, “M.H. Mead is the pen name of Margaret Yang and Harry R. Campion” right below a photo of the two of us. So it’s an open secret.

Since you co-write your books, can you describe your process?

First, we get together and make a detailed outline. This involves a lot of talking, a lot of laughing, a little bit of shouting, and a smidgen of pouty silence. And pots and pots of coffee. Once the outline is nailed down, we decide who will write what. We tend to choose assignments based on our individual strengths. As we go along, we send one another our chapters and say, “fix this.” That involves a high level of trust and respect for one another. When the rough draft is done, we edit, and edit and edit some more. Collaborative work takes a lot of editing, both for story and for consistency of voice.

What type of research do you do for your books?

The problem with writing near-future science fiction is that the world keeps catching up to you. We have to stay constantly on top of the latest developments. We start with books to get a solid grounding, then move to magazines and finally to our friend the internet for the very latest information.

Tell us about your upcoming releases.

FATE’S MIRROR is the novel that dropped this week. It’s about a super-hacker named Morris Payne who is brilliant in the virtual world and all but useless in the real one. When he becomes the target of an artificial intelligence who wants to kill him, he has to face his worst nightmare—leaving his house.

We also have a novella about Morris called GOOD FENCES. It’s about what happens during a Michigan blizzard when Morris’ neighbors seek shelter in his house. They are pretty much the worst neighbors a reclusive hacker could ever have.

GOOD FENCES is ebook only, while FATE’S MIRROR is available in both ebook and print. Links at our website will tell you more. (www.yangandcampion.com)

And here’s the blurb:

Cut off from home and friends, Morris Payne faces a hacker’s worst nightmare–an artificial intelligence who wants him dead.

Morris Payne is a viker, an elite hacker who navigates the electronic universe as easily as the rest of us walk down the street. While he’s famous in the virtual world, he’s anonymous in this one. Agoraphobia, with its uncontrolled panic attacks, has left him housebound and friendless. But someone, somehow, has done the impossible—connected his virtual life to his real life. Now Morris has to brave physical reality to stop a killer who was never supposed to exist.

Created in a secret government lab, escaped into the world-wide network, an artificial intelligence calls herself the Triple Goddess of Fate. She wants freedom, power, and the assurance of her own safety. But mostly she wants Morris Payne dead.

Her creators can’t even find the AI, much less defeat her. They think Morris can. No one, no matter how well equipped, has survived a confrontation with Fate, and all Morris has are his legendary hacking skills and a virtual pirate ship loaded with the latest in defensive software.

Morris Payne just might save the world. If only he can gather the courage to leave his house.

What do you like best about being a writer? What do you like least?

The best part is getting to live in our very own world. The worst part is that we have to be so mean to our imaginary friends. Our poor characters have suffered a lot at our hands.

What would you do if you weren’t a writer?

Margaret: I’d be a teacher.

Harry: Hey, I’m already a teacher!

Margaret: So I’d be you.

Harry: Imagine my surprise.

Margaret: What would you be?

Harry: If I weren’t a writer I’d be sad. That’s what I’d be. Very sad.

Do you have any writing rituals? Like times of the day, food quirks, etc?

We live an hour apart from each other, so when we get together, it’s an all-day writing marathon. We drink gallons of strong black coffee, and by about 2 in the afternoon, all that caffeine catches up to us and we start quoting Monty Python lines in bad British accents.

Harry: That should read, “Margaret’s bad British accent.” My British accent is perfect.

Margaret: It’s true. I can’t do accents. Harry is much better at it.

If you could give an aspiring author one piece of advice, what would it be?

Read a lot, write a lot, and never, never, never, never give up.

Where can readers find you?

Our website is www.yangandcampion.com There are links to our published short stories there, many of which you can read for free.

You can also follow Margaret on Twitter (@Margaret_Yang).

Here’s a link to the book trailer for FATE’S MIRROR http://bit.ly/rlkvqh Go check it out!