Bronwyn Green

The Corner of Quirky & Kinky

Today, Cait and I tag-team babysat our niece and nephew. I filled in for her while she went to a doctor’s appointment, and I had this conversation with my niece about her inflatable pool.

Madelynn: It needs more air. It’s all floppy.

Me: Sorry kiddo – you’re going to have to use it as is. I don’t have an air compressor to fill it.

Madelynn: (leading me into the garage an pointing at the gimundo size compressor sitting on a very high shelf.) You can use this!

Me: But your Daddy isn’t home right now, and I can’t use that without talking to him first because it belongs to him.

Madelynn: No it doesn’t.

Me: Then who does it belong to?

Madelynn: You!

Me: Oh really…

Madelynn: Yes. (Clearly trying to think of something fast.) You forgot and left it here last time. So now you can fix my pool.

Yeah…that kid is gonna go places in life. I’m just hoping it’s not to jail.

A few weeks ago, I stumbled across information that said that Brian Froud and his wife Wendy were coming to Traverse City for a book signing. I just about hyperventilated. I’ve always wanted to meet them.

Brian is my very favorite artist and Wendy is a brilliant sculptor, specializing in dolls and puppets. We have her to thank for Yoda and many of the creatures in Dark Crystal and Labyrinth.

I packed twenty-two books and three DVDs into my giant tote bag. Then, out of morbid curiosity, I weighed it. Thirty-one pounds of pure awesomeness. Matt looked at me, shook his head and muttered “freak” and Killian asked if I was worried that they’d think I was a stalker. I told him that I prefer to think of it as helping to pay their salary and Matt just looked at me and said, that my rationalization skills didn’t make me any less of a freak.

Whatever.

So, on Saturday, I piled into the car with Jen and our friends Emily and Becky for a brief road trip. Jen and Em only brought a few things, but I felt somewhat vindicated to see that Becky’s bag was almost as heavy as mine.

When we got to Traverse City, there was no parking to be had. Every available spot was taken, and I swear we drove around the city for hours looking. Okay, it was only about fifteen minutes, but driving in new cities (especially those with a ridiculous amount of one way streets and heavy foot traffic) wigs me out. There was some kind of wooden boat regatta going on (I don’t know if it was an actual regatta. I just like saying that word.) and there were tons of people everywhere. There were also signs that said, Don’t Even Think Of Parking Here. I finally pulled over in the middle of a crowded back alley-parking lot-esque thing and told Jen it was her turn to drive.

After not-so-subtly mocking me, Jen took the wheel and drove around some more. After about the third pass, someone spotted an empty spot. Jen yelled for someone to get out and stand in the parking spot. So Becky jumped out, losing her shoe in the process. As she reached in to grab it, Jen yelled, “Green light, gotta go!” and hit the gas leaving Becky standing in the road.

After we circled the block, we made it back to the only free parking spot in the city – the spot that Becky, wearing only one shoe, was bravely guarding. Jen tried to maneuver into the spot only to realize that she can’t parallel park.

Unfortunately neither can I.

Nor can Emily.

So it was Becky to the rescue. Again.

Jen hopped out and Becky hopped in and parked the car. Unfortunately, the dude behind us thought were leaving and was pissed to discover that we were taking the spot he clearly wanted. Too bad. So sad.

On the hike to the bookstore, we tried to find a bathroom. No luck and Becky was kind enough to help me carry my books because I’d chosen then to have an asthma attack. I’m nothing if not pain in the ass.

Finally…finally we made it to the bookstore. The lovely, lovely bookstore. And there they were – Brian and Wendy Froud. Looking remarkably like their author photos – which in and of itself is pretty amazing. And zOMG, they were so nice. Granted, they looked a little surprised by the number of books and DVDs we (okay, mostly Becky and I) brought with us, but they were so sweet and friendly and graciously signed every single one of them – even though I felt like a bit of an ass at that point. And Brian doodled goblins and elves and spriggans in each book – and different ones every time, too.

My husband pointed out to me that I’d hugely increased the value of the collection – especially the out of print ones. I suppose, but it’s not like I’m going to sell them. But I’ll admit to being curious enough to check the going prices for the OOP ones on ebay. (50$-300$ and none of them were signed.)

Being a nice mama, I did ask Wendy to sign the Empire Strikes Back dvd to Killian and Corwin.

After we got everything signed, we took a few pictures then went to grab a bite to eat before heading home. I’m so glad we went. I have amazing friends. And now I also have an amazing collection of signed books and DVDs.

Here’s a pic of the awesome collection along with some of the doodles.






I don’t remember how it came up, but we were all sitting around the campfire on vacation and someone mentioned Prohibition and how the itty bitty hotel in the rural town my dad grew up in had its own Speakeasy – only here in Michigan, they didn’t call them speakeasies – they were called blind pigs. The fact that the hotel had a blind pig didn’t surprise me, but I was a little startled to discover that my Great-Grandpa Elmer was a whiskey runner. Apparently, the family cattle truck had a false bottom used to hide booze. The best natured cows got lots of rides as a cover for illegal deliveries.

So I was asking my mom this morning if she knew about that. My parents divorced when I was pretty young, so I wasn’t sure if she’d known that or not. For the record, she didn’t, but she did have some more interesting family history for me. Evidently, my maternal Great Grandparents made their own booze and sold it. Great-Grandma Johanna made bathtub beer and Great-Grandpa Englebert had a still down behind the chicken coop and their oldest two sons used to drive the stuff to a nearby town where the men gathered for “meetings” between their two Sunday services. From all accounts, the evening services were more interesting than the morning one.

Good to know I come from enterprising stock. 😉

Here are a few more vacation pictures if anyone wants to have a peek.

Indian Lake at sunset.

The Seul Choix Pointe Lighthouse in Gulliver, MI. It’s the last working lighthouse on the northern shore of Lake Michigan.
The creepy, creepy stairs in the lighthouse. I realized that at about 70ish feet up, I’m kinda scared of heights. Actually, the going up was fine. The going down was freaking terrifying – especially crawling through the hatchways in the upper two levels. Yeah, I have no idea what I was thinking either.

Beach at Au Train.
Lake Superior at Au Train.
Just a random lake along highway 123 in the UP.
Lake Superior shoreline. I love this picture. 🙂
Lookit all the pretty stones on the beach! I was in rock picker heaven. Anyone sensing a theme here?
Lake Superior at Whitefish Point. One of my very favorite spots.

So many bits of randomness to share today. . .

First off, the freaking fantastic Kris Norris made me a shiny new book trailer for Moonlit Menage – you can see it here. I’d put it on the blog, but I always end up screwing something up, and it rarely works right, so I’m jut putting up the link.

Secondly, fellow Michigan author, and all around awesome person, Roxanne Roads, has graciously allowed me to guest post on her Fangtastic Books blog and offer a contest. I’d love it if you stopped by and said hi and enter the contest. 🙂

And lastly, my washing machine is on the fritz. Actually, it’s old and tired and sick of the insane amounts of laundry I force it to do every week. Last night, it stopped in the middle of a load and I went downstairs to fiddle with it and had the following conversation that Chris said I had to post.

Me: (in the basement) C’mon sweetie. I know you’re tired, but can’t you just hang in there with me? Just until tax time?

Matt: (yelling through down the laundry chute that’s under the bathroom sink on the first floor) Who are you talking to?

Me: The washing machine. I’m trying to convince it that it has something to live for.

Matt: (a long period of silence followed by the door to the laundry chute door slowing closing, then a squeak as it’s wrenched back open) Is it working?

For those of you who may be wondering, the washing machine was swayed by my pleas and began working again.

YAY!!!

EDIT: We’re currently looking for a name for our esteemed laundry companion – actually, we’re just hoping that the right name and the proper amount of respect and gratitude will keep it running for a few more months. So c’mon people, help me name that washing machine.

All suggestions are welcome!!!!

I spent a glorious week up in the U.P. with the fam. It was my dad and stepmom, my brother and his fam, my stepbrother and his fam, my other stepbrother, my sil’s dad, and because my dad and stepmom get along so well with my mom, she was invited too! Best. Family. Ever.

It was amazing and relaxing and I so wish I were still there! But I did miss my friends and my kitties…

We took an amazing mine tour to see bat habitats, but I’ll post more about that later in the week. (I’m sure Chris is thrilled by this prospect.) We also spent some quality time in Lake Michigan, at Lake Superior (the water is too damn cold to swim in!) at a few local lighthouses and on Indian Lake. I took a ridiculous amount of pictures – over 500! Thank goodness for digital cameras! But I promise not to bore you with all of them – just a select few. 😉

Sunset on Indian Lake where we spent the weekSunset on Indian Lake
Kitch-iti-kipi a.k.a. Big Spring
Kitch-iti-kipi a.k.a. Big Spring
Lake Michigan shore line in Manistique, MI.

The lighthouse at Manistique, MI – northern shore of Lake MI

First off, thank you to everyone who stopped by and commented on the interviews – you guys rock! And thank you also to Charlotte, Jessica and Rachel! I hope everyone gets a chance to read their stories. 🙂

Genella, to answer your music question I had a special Moonlit Menage playlist that included artists like Kate Rusby, Kate Price, Loreena McKennitt, Abney Park, Circa Paleo, Elvendrums, S.J. Tucker and Susan McKeown.

Now…on to the winner! Corwin, my son who likes to help me pick contest winners, has chosen!

Actually, he’s chosen two winners…because he “likes even numbers better.”

So, would Michelle and daydrmzzz please email me at bronwyn@bronwyngreen.com and let me know what formats you’d like of my Celtic Fire collection?

I’m still away on vacation, but through the wonder of blogger and preposting, I actually have a blog today. Let me tell you about three wonderful women who are also wonderful writers – Charlotte, Jessica and Rachel. I am so freaking thrilled that we were all chosen to participate in the Sultry Solstice Collection.

I’d like to share a little bit about each one of them so please sit back and enjoy my fellow faery authors! And one lucky commenter will win all three ebooks in my Celtic Fire Series! (A winner will be chosen on Sunday, August 1st, at 7 pm EST)

So please, comment, ask questions, help me welcome my victims, I mean…interview subjects! I’ve had the extreme pleasure of reading all three Sultry Solstice stories and they’re FANTASTIC! I highly recommend them all!

1.) Why did you want to take part in the Sultry Solstice collection? What appealed to you about it?

Charlotte: Everything. Fairy stuff, magic, summer sensuality, Zachary Quinto’s bare ass, Labyrinthy stuff, magic, writing more things for Total-E-Bound…

Interviewers note: Zachary Quinto’s bare ass is indeed motivational. Just sayin’

Jessica: Anything about faeries intrigues me. My first published book was the start of my faery series, The Fey. So a collection centered around faeries definitely appealed to me.

Rachel: It was a cold, rainy day in January. I saw the words “sultry” and “summer” and knew that if I didn’t immediately start writing about gorgeous people having al fresco naughtiness in a forest glade I was going to go crazy from the winter blahs and order an ill-advised novelty sun-lamp off Amazon. And then I was fortunate enough that the editors at Total E-Bound were clearly trying to avoid sun-lamps too. So, win-win, especially since it’s been so great getting to know the other writers in the collection!

2.) When you started this book, what was the one scene that was the clearest in your mind – the scene that you knew you had to have in your story?

Charlotte: The hero running naked through a green, wavering field. The feel of something dark and blazing behind him, at the end.

Jessica: The first time the 2 heroes and the heroine make love. That was what was in my head from the very beginning. Not so much the physical aspect of it…though that’s just swell….but the emotions and thoughts of the characters’ heads were so clear to me from the get go. As a result, I didn’t write the story from beginning to end the way I normally do. I started with that scene and bounced around. Then I had to go back and “sew” it all together. LOL

Rachel: The scene that fuelled the story for me was definitely Mira’s discovery ofthe captive Johnny. I wanted to explore her shock, her arousal, her confusion. And, of course, the aesthetics of a desirable young man spread
out across an ancient oak! His vulnerability, her conflict, the otherworldly setting…I loved writing the chemistry between them.
3.) Do you have a faery inspiration? Feel free to share pictures if you have them.

Charlotte: The world of the movie Labyrinth has always been a strong influence on me, and particularly its idea of what fairies are really like-cruel little imps that bite you. And I think we’ve discussed the work of Brian Froud before, which definitely inspires. It’s hard not to look at his work and be inspired. All the hidden little ugly-beautiful things…that’s what I imagine when I think of other worlds.

Jessica: I love David Delamare’s faery art. Amy Brown and Jessica Galbreth are 2 other artists whose work I stare at while plotting my faeries.

Rachel: I was looking through some old pictures taken at the Latitude music festival and rediscovered this beauty. When I saw the Sultry Solstice call I thought it would be great to mix the idea of someone dressing up like a fairy at a festival with actual fairies (who probably wouldn’t appreciate that very much).

Interviewers note: I’m thinking that would definitely piss off the faeries!

4.) What five words would you use to describe your writing?

Charlotte: Ridiculous. Fun. Dirty. Love-suffused.

Jessica: Oh boy…I don’t know. I hope it’s fun, engaging, emotional, sexy, and hot.

Rachel: “The perfect amount of cock.” (Note to self: What eloquence did you expect when you asked your tipsy dinner guests for their thoughts on this question?)

5.) What shiny new projects do you have coming up? Share!

Charlotte: Oh, I’ve got loads coming up. More than I ever thought I’d have coming up. Got a lot of sci-fi coming out soon- Past Pleasures is out August 9th from Total-E-Bound, and it’s all dirty threesomes and time travelling and strange woman-less future worlds. Then there’s The Horizon, which will be my first release with Ellora’s Cave. That’s out September 10th, and it’s about spaceships and lust drugs and it’s built on my love of funny sci-fi like Firefly and Red Dwarf. Oh, and I’ve got a novel coming out in November, about a woman who has to choose between a dominant and a submissive. Busy busy!

Jessica: I’m currently working on the next book in my vampire series, Into the Shadows – Seth’s story. I’ve got a lot more “in the works”–the final 2 stories in my faery series, The Fey–and hopefully will be able to announce
some new releases soon!

Rachel: I’ve been quite into threesomes lately (who isn’t?), and I’ve got several in the works, including a very-enjoyable-to-write Victorian-era BDSM story. At the moment I’m working on a free read that’s a prequel to the events of The Festival Spirit (three days of hot sex in a swanky NYC hotel!), and if all goes according to my devious plan, that’s not the last you’ll see of Lee, Johnny and Mira.

I’m pleased to say that I’m on vacation. I’m in the wilds of the UP and I couldn’t be happier! Thus far, I haven’t done a bit of work, and I don’t think I plan to. The only reason I’m even online is because the owners of the resort are graciously letting me sit on their back deck. 🙂

I’m going to share some pretties with you and then I’m off to beach along with my SPF Vampire sunscreen, a book, my kids, my nieces and nephews and the camera! But first some pics of my little slice of paradise!


This is my reading spot. (Click to embiggen to see how pretty!)


This is the gorgeous sunset the first night!


This is our super adorable cabin! Will take pics of the inside later to share. 🙂

I’ve always wanted to go to Lilith Fair and on Wednesday, I finally got my chance!

My friend and her daughter (one of my former daycare girlies – who’s going off to college this fall O.o) invited me and my sister, Cait, so of course, we jumped at it! It was hot and sticky and gross, but we tried to stay in the shade as much as possible. And Cait and I repeatedly reapplied our SPF Vampire sunscreen.

Water was ridiculously priced – 3.50 for a 20 ounce bottle – so staying hydrated was problematic since the venue didn’t allow us to bring in our own water.

But other than that, we had a great time. There were 11 acts. Jetty Rae (a local woman), Vita Chambers (who was all of 15 – I have a feeling she’ll be big in a few years), Melissa McClelland, Cara Salimando, Lights, Kate Nash, Chantal Kreviazuk, Suzanne Vega, Courtyard Hounds, Miranda Lambert and of course, Sarah McLachlan,

We listened to Jetty, Vita, Melissa and Cara. They were all pretty good. We wandered away from the lower stages to go stake out a good spot on the hill so we could watch Kate Nash who I was really looking forward to seeing. Unfortunately, there was a schedule change and we missed her.

Suzanne Vega was fantastic. I’ve loved her for years and have never gotten a chance to see her. Courtyard Hounds were excellent, too. Then there was Miranda Lambert. I know she’s quite popular on the country music scene, but…yeah…I wasn’t feeling it. It felt a lot like the set that would never end. But Sarah was worth the wait. I wasn’t sure how she’d be live. You can never tell how someone’s voice will translate from the studio to a live performance, but it was beautiful. Definitely worth the sweaty wait.