Bronwyn Green

The Corner of Quirky & Kinky

I love my children more than I ever thought it was possible to love anyone, but holy hell, some days all I can do is blink. And then get another cup of coffee. I also need to preface this exchange by saying that this kid is so incredibly smart, but some days, the lack of common sense drives me batty. I thought once they hit high school this stuff wouldn’t be an issue.

Spoiler Alert: I was wrong.

Me: Corwin, did you ever throw your clothes from your overnight down the laundry chute?

Corwin: I did that already.

Me: Okay, go get your suit and towel because I don’t have time to wash it before we go to Sarah’s today. (Full disclosure – they were dry when he came home from the overnight and he’d only worn it once.)

Corwin: Are we going somewhere today?

Me: Yes. To Sarah’s. I just told you that.

Corwin: Okay. *goes upstairs, presumably to look for his swimsuit*

Me: *stares after him and wonders when he’ll remember that the laundry chute leads to the basement, not his bedroom*

Corwin: *comes back downstairs* I can’t find it.

Me: I thought you told me that you threw it down the chute. Go check in the basement.

Corwin: *goes down the basement, immediately comes back upstairs* It’s in the laundry bin.

Me: *fights urge to repeatedly smash cupboard door into my forehead* I know. I told you that I didn’t have time to wash it. Bring it and your towel up.

Corwin: *goes back down, comes up with only the swimsuit* I can’t find my towel.

Me: Go. Look. Again.
Corwin: *returns with towel, blithely wanders away to continue drawing*

This is the one I have. I wouldn’t trade him ever, but there are days that just make me shake my head.

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